Whay Whay Joo Joo

[action, early in the day]



[Hagakure can be found at the Goldenrod department store, doing a little shopping. At the most opportune moment, he's at the cash register getting his items rung up. He doesn't look very happy about it, though. In fact, he looks downright horrified.]

A total of P666?! You can't be serious! That's like, a super bad omen! You gotta tell me you made a mistake ringing that crap up!

[The extremely confused cashier tries to reason with the freaked out Hagakure, but after not being able to calm him down, she eventually finds a coupon from the store's coupon book and applies it out of pity. This time, the total comes to P444, and...Hagakure isn't any happier about it.]

Now it's really unlucky!! Why is this happening to meeeeee?!

[There are bad signs everywhere and his luck is so bad, you guys.]

[video]

[It's been a long time since Hagakure made a post to the network. In fact, the subject he's going to be talking about is the same as his last post. He's been purposely avoiding posting for Several Reasons but that's not the point right now. After the continuation of earth tremors, glowing crystals, agitated Psychic types, bad number omens, and now near-constant headaches of his own, he knows it's time to speak up.]

Long time no see, guys! How's it going?

[He's surprisingly upbeat despite...everything, but hey, it's always good to appear totally cool on the network.

Not that he's ever done a good job of that, but you know.]

Since these weird tremors and glowing crystals haven't let up, I figured I'd lend my services to you guys. Ya see, I'm a fortune teller and I'm really good with Psychic types. For everyone who has at least one, you've had to have noticed that they've been acting really unlike themselves every time these tremors come around and the crystals flip out.

[He seems a little troubled when he talks about that, but he presses on.]

Well, I can help with that! I've got a ton of Psychic types, and I have plenty of techniques to calm 'em down that I'd be happy to share.

I did something like this the last time the crystals were messing things up, but this time I'm opening up my office for personal visits. [His office being…his room at the Dangan House.] So if you have an anxious Psychic type, you can bring 'em over and I'll personally show you how to help 'em out.

[…there has to be a catch to this, but if there is one, Hagakure's not saying.]

So yeah, just drop me a line here and we can work something out! I can do long distance appointments too, for everyone not in Goldenrod.

[Aaand deep breath. Phew. Okay, now that the business is out of the way...his face suddenly gets a lot more serious.]

I'm also up for discussing the tremors and crystals, especially from people who were here for the last crystal attack. I'd really like to hear your theories behind 'em, 'cause this is getting kiiind of crazy.

You guys don't think the last attack was just a precursor to something even worse, do you...?

[With that awful thought in mind, Hagakure ends the feed there.]