fortune 004 | video

[crystalballer]

[Hagakure's most recent post is taking place outside...on the roof of the Dangan House from the looks of things. He seems to be in deep thought, but not quite so much as the Meditite sitting beside him. It looks like nothing could stop that Pokemon from its meditation.

It should also be noted that he has significantly less hair than he did in his previous broadcast. Character development!! Or something. Or maybe the January heatwave just got to him. Either way, it'll probably look really weird for those who know him and haven't seen the change yet.

But with that sidebar over...]

Okay guys, I'm pretty sure we can all agree that the January heatwave was really freaky. We even had some guesses that maybe the end of the world was coming, but I didn't get any of those kinda vibes from Fates so it wasn't that.

But that's not all the weird weather that's been goin' on lately...

[He picks the 'Gear up to give a general view of the scenery. It's sunny and calm, with not as much snow around as you'd expect in February. The skyline of Goldenrod City can be seen not too far off from this view too.]

I dunno if you guys've noticed, but the weather's been the same for like a week. Same temps, same sunny sky, same everything! I dunno if that's creepier than nineties in the middle of January or what.

But I think I finally know what's goin' down here.

[Similar to his first post, he brings the 'Gear closer to his face and lowers his voice like he's trying to keep a secret, despite the fact that he's practically alone (like his Meditite's going to be listening in) and he's telling this to the entire network.]

Something's seriously up, you guys. I think someone's—I'd say it's the government, but does Johto even have one? Anyway, someone's found out a way to control the weather, either with a machine or a really powerful Pokemon or something, and they're like...testing it to see what it can do. Then they're gonna use it to manipulate the weather for their benefit! I bet they set the weather like this to lure out those weird Bloober things for them to catch en masse and sell on the Black Market!!

[The further he goes, the more animated and passionate he gets about this ridiculous conspiracy theory.]

And that's not all, oh no. That's just the beginning! Once they perfect the weather manipulation, they're gonna improve whatever they're using and figure out how to control our minds! They're gonna totally brainwash us to do their bidding!!

[Oh god he's legitimately serious about this, someone stop him.]

Sure, it all sounds like something you'd expect from a cartoon, but believe me when I say it's totally possible. I've done a lot of reading and researching back home, and seriously, you guys have no idea what groups with a lot of money and power can actually do.

[Finally finished with his rant, Hagakure takes a moment to inhale and catch his breath.]

So my point in all this is basically, next time something else really weird happens with the weather, remember what I said, 'kay? Maybe we should try to get to the bottom of this sometime before it gets seriously bad. Oh! And make sure you're always aware of yourself. You never know when you'll end up doing something you never thought you would due to brainwashing.

[He gives a nod of approval as if he feels he's proud of himself for that...whatever that was, then ends the feed there.]

Comments

[Video]

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

[It's rare that Cobra actually pays attention to the entirety of what people are saying, but once he hears the part about controlling the weather, he just sort of stopped what he was doing and listened the whole way through. And once the broadcast is done, he just has one question.]

Who told you about all of my plansssss?

[Seriously. Stuff he's done here, stuff he's done at home, things he plans to do. What is this guy? Some sort of spy?]

[Video] 1/2

[crystalballer]

[...wait what.]

I-I was right?

[Video]

[crystalballer]

I mean, of course I was right!

And I'm not revealing my sources! But lemme just say they're very reliable!

[It might've been the spirits. Or some ridiculous conspiracy theory blog. We just don't know.]

What're you gonna do now that we're onto you, huh? We'll take you down sooner or later either way!

[audio]

[neurotoxined]

[...what the...

It takes her a few minutes and a replay to figure out what she was just looking at and that the thing she was looking at was, indeed, meant to be looked at in all seriousness; that said, Hagakure, you are getting the slowest of slow claps right now.]

Well, you did it. You cracked the code. You figured it out. You have worked out the reason we were all brought here, and you've managed to warn us all.

Good for you. Handshakes all around.

[audio] 1/2

[crystalballer]

[Unsurprisingly, the sarcasm flies right over Hagakure's head and does not hit his hair this time though. Instead, he responds with an air of overconfidence.]

Glad you agree with me! I'd take you up on that handshake but it's kinda hard to do that through the 'Gear.

[audio]

[crystalballer]

Wait...

[A part of that comment suddenly catches his attention after the fact.]

Are you saying you think the people who're behind the weather manipulation brought us here too? Oh dude, I didn't even think of that...

[Just give him a second to get over his reality being shattered.]

[Locked]

[crackpotcrocker]

[Denzel just can't help but stare uncomfortably at Hagakure's hair before speaking from the shadows. If Hagakure pays any attention to Crocker's glasses there appears to be strange green letters... Almost like computer code.]

Actually, from what I've heard the winter before last Team Rocket was the one behind almost bringing the world to an end using an ice-type Pokemon. [He just hears things that's all.]

...Unfortunately, I cannot confirm if this time it's also the Rockets or the Pokemon themselves are for some reason thrown off - BALANCE!

[There he goes body twitching off his chair.]

[Locked]

[crystalballer]

[...dude you're gonna hurt yourself one day if you keep that up.

But Hagakure's really interested in what Crocker had to say just now.]

Oh yeah, Team Rocket! They definitely fit the bill for an organization that could be behind this. But...they've already tried something like this before? What else d'you know about it?

[Crocker really seems to know about Team Rocket...hmm.]

[Video]

[tearsofademon]

[...]

...Erm, I was with you until that whole brainwashing part.

[Video]

[crystalballer]

What's not to get? Brainwashing is just as possible as weather manipulation, dude.

Video;

[puppetnurse]

B-b-brainwashing?! [You've got this poor girl somewhat terrified, Hagakure.]

Th-that can't actually happen, can it?

Video;

[crystalballer]

[She should be.]

No, it totally can! It's been done tons of times all throughout history!

[Wow he's really not helping the situation, is he.]

But as long as you do what I suggested and pay attention to your actions, you should be okay. I have a couple charms that protect against outside interference too, if you want one.

voice; → soon to be action;

[nostabbing]

Oh my god that must be it.

[BRILLIANCE ONCE AGAIN FROM HAGAKURE, HOLY SHIT.]

voice; until action;!

[crystalballer]

[Success, people are actually with him on this.]

Right?! It's gotta be! Everything that's been happening totally adds up to it!

video;

[superordinary]

...What?

[ That's literally all Naegi has to say. What the fuck, Hagakure. ]

video;

[crystalballer]

[Naegi, you've disappointed him.]

Were you not listening clearly enough or something, Naegi-chi? I explained it all as simply as possible...

[video]

[20faces]

I'm not sure it's possible to brainwash someone with a weather machine...

[For some reason he readily accepts the idea that there's a machine controlling the weather, though.]

They're probably just testing it so they can keep the region in eternal spring!

[video]

[crystalballer]

No no, it's definitely a possibility. If they have a machine that's using radio waves like the one I read about back home, they can use the same waves to control minds too!

[IT'S TOTALLY LEGIT.

...huh, he hadn't thought of that possibility though.]

Eternal Spring? Why would they want to do that?

[video]

[rocketralph]

<sub>[Ralph maaaay have been one of those to catch a bunch of Bloobers and turn them in to his boss, but he's no weather manipulator.]

[He's also used to conditions staying the same for long spans of time. Say...thirty years?]</sub>

No offence, kid, but I think you may have been out in the sun too long.

[video]

[crystalballer]

Huh?

[He curiously glances at his arms and legs, then feels his cheeks with his free hand.]

I don't think I got sunburned...I'm pretty tan so I don't burn that easily.

[POINT COMPLETELY MISSED.]

Video

[haveyouseenalittlegirl]

Not to be rude but.....how did you get from weather manipulation to brainwashing?

Video

[crystalballer]

[Hagakure's happy to oblige that simple question.]

If they're using airwaves to manipulate the weather, they can take the same thing and it set it to penetrate human brains too! It's that simple, dude.

[Video]

[babel_hacker]

[Did someone say conspiracy theories?]

That might be possible! If they have a weather machine, they can probably spend their funding into adding mind control!

[...Well, it's been a while since he indulge in a good ol' conspiracy theory chat.]

[Video]

[crystalballer]

[Bless you, Atsuro.]

Right? It's totally doable for an organization who could pull off weather control all by itself! I wonder where they've stashed it though...maybe one of the mountains where there aren't as many people around?

[video]

[exeggutorhead]

[...what is this guy even]

A few years ago, the weather stayed the same for an entire month, and then at the end of it we were attacked by monsters from another dimension.

[Envy puts on a deadly serious expression to share this news. And while it's true, he knows for a fact that this is not at all like what happened back then and really he just wants to see what this guy will do.]

And you never know in this world, the same thing might be happening again.

[video]

[crystalballer]

[Well, Envy's successfully scared the absolute hell out of Hagakure with that little story.]

Are...are you for serious, dude? Wh-what if that happens again now that the weather's been like this?! How did you guys fight 'em off? This could be life or death info for us newbies!!

[Video]

[gardentrainer]

[Uhhh...]

I guess mind control would be possible, but I don't think brainwashing and controlling the weather correlate.

Let's say that they have a machine that can do that. It can control the weather. It would be much easier than mind control as they are controlling one aspect. I mean, the weather seems to be a constant all around, so I'm going to assume that the weather is one entity. It's a large entity, but that's more of a power issue than a complexity issue.

But if you want to control minds, you'd need a fairly complex and powerful machine. We all think on different wavelengths and we're all individuals. It would take a lot of power to be able to control all our minds. It would also have to take in account of everyone's thinking patterns, so this machine must be very complex.

At least, that's what I'm assuming would be the case, but maybe it's possible they can easily control us! But that would require a lot of research in the weather patterns and we'd need concrete evidence that the weather is being controlled by them to prove your hypothesis.

[Video]

[crystalballer]

[...Whoa, he wasn't expecting someone to get really scientific on him. He's gotta admit that he's impressed, if not really intimidated by this.]

I...I guess we'd have to watch the weather a little more for me to give you solid proof, but seriously, the weird January heatwave and then this stretch of identical weather days is at least worth noting, right?

That's a really good point about the mind control thing though, I guess I never thought of it that way...I mean, maybe it could be possible if a really powerful Psychic type Pokemon took control of our minds, but I dunno if any of them can also do weather stuff.

video

[islandshore]

[Riku bites his lip, trying to hold back his laughter. What's this guy's deal? Mind control? Government conspiracies? Sounds like he's taking it a bit too far...

But man, he'll roll with it. Humor this guy a little.]

You know, when Pokémon can pick up moves like Sunny Day naturally, isn't it just as possible that some of the wildlife's just messing around? Maybe the fire types are tired of the cold and want to shake things up.

video

[crystalballer]

[Excuse you, he's not taking it too far at all!!

Okay maybe he is, but he's not going to admit it.]

Huh, yeah, that's a good point. But that opens up a whole other can of worms, ya know. That'd mean all the Fire types banded together to do this.

Why are they tired of the cold though? It's not like they have to worry about being cold since a lot of them have fire inside of them.