fortune 006 | video/action for Goldenrod

[crystalballer]

[action, early in the day]



[Hagakure can be found at the Goldenrod department store, doing a little shopping. At the most opportune moment, he's at the cash register getting his items rung up. He doesn't look very happy about it, though. In fact, he looks downright horrified.]

A total of P666?! You can't be serious! That's like, a super bad omen! You gotta tell me you made a mistake ringing that crap up!

[The extremely confused cashier tries to reason with the freaked out Hagakure, but after not being able to calm him down, she eventually finds a coupon from the store's coupon book and applies it out of pity. This time, the total comes to P444, and...Hagakure isn't any happier about it.]

Now it's really unlucky!! Why is this happening to meeeeee?!

[There are bad signs everywhere and his luck is so bad, you guys.]

[video]

[It's been a long time since Hagakure made a post to the network. In fact, the subject he's going to be talking about is the same as his last post. He's been purposely avoiding posting for Several Reasons but that's not the point right now. After the continuation of earth tremors, glowing crystals, agitated Psychic types, bad number omens, and now near-constant headaches of his own, he knows it's time to speak up.]

Long time no see, guys! How's it going?

[He's surprisingly upbeat despite...everything, but hey, it's always good to appear totally cool on the network.

Not that he's ever done a good job of that, but you know.]

Since these weird tremors and glowing crystals haven't let up, I figured I'd lend my services to you guys. Ya see, I'm a fortune teller and I'm really good with Psychic types. For everyone who has at least one, you've had to have noticed that they've been acting really unlike themselves every time these tremors come around and the crystals flip out.

[He seems a little troubled when he talks about that, but he presses on.]

Well, I can help with that! I've got a ton of Psychic types, and I have plenty of techniques to calm 'em down that I'd be happy to share.

I did something like this the last time the crystals were messing things up, but this time I'm opening up my office for personal visits. [His office being…his room at the Dangan House.] So if you have an anxious Psychic type, you can bring 'em over and I'll personally show you how to help 'em out.

[…there has to be a catch to this, but if there is one, Hagakure's not saying.]

So yeah, just drop me a line here and we can work something out! I can do long distance appointments too, for everyone not in Goldenrod.

[Aaand deep breath. Phew. Okay, now that the business is out of the way...his face suddenly gets a lot more serious.]

I'm also up for discussing the tremors and crystals, especially from people who were here for the last crystal attack. I'd really like to hear your theories behind 'em, 'cause this is getting kiiind of crazy.

You guys don't think the last attack was just a precursor to something even worse, do you...?

[With that awful thought in mind, Hagakure ends the feed there.]

Comments

action;

[nostabbing]

[As it happens, Parker is at the Department Store for completely unrelated and independent reasons (she comes here sometimes to look at things and admire things and definitely not steal things because she's trying to be better about that but it's not illegal to think about how she could, certainly), but by now she'd recognize Hagakure's voice — and his anguished cry — pretty much anywhere, so as his bad-luck adventure begins, she hightails it over to the cash register to see what's going on.]

Heeeeeey, look at that, funny meeting you here!

[This is attempted code for "what is the matter, do I need to stab someone, if so please indicate them surreptitiously and I will take it from there.]

Whatcha doin', Hagakure?

action;

[crystalballer]

[By the time Parker shows up, Hagakure's dejectedly paying for his items. It's not like the cashier could help the fact that the items totaled to numbers that apparently have terrible implications in other cultures, so she's trying to rush the hysteric young man along before he draws an even bigger crowd with his ranting.

He looks a little startled at first when she calls out to him, only because of what just happened.]

O-Oh, Alice-chi...

[He almost messed up and used her real name, but thankfully he's just as used to Alice as he is Parker at this rate.

From the look on his face, you'd think he just predicted the end of the world. Fortunately he's just being incredibly over-superstitious.]

I was just getting some stuff, but I got some really bad signs in the process. I don't know what I did to deserve two unlucky numbers in one day!

[No need to stab the poor cashier, Parker...]

video;

[throw_stone]

[Ramza is currently sitting near the edge of Goldenrod, holding his Espurr. It's been freaking out this whole time - that proves it's a psychic-type, though.

His head-Flabebe is just... petting his head.]

I wasn't here when those crystals appeared.

[He's got a very serious look - he's not been happy for a while. He doesn't know why, though...]

If more is coming, we'd best train - stay close together. If it is an army of crystal, we must simply become stronger.

[...]

But perhaps we'd best talk in person. 'Twould be nice to see you face-to-face.

video;

[crystalballer]

Hey, Ramza-chi!

[It's good to hear from Ramza again, and looks like he's made it to Goldenrod...? He'll be examining that Espurr from his end as he talks.]

That's exactly what it was last time...crystals everywhere, and I just thought they were OOParts or something cool. Turns out they're definitely the opposite of cool. Jury's still out on the OOPart part though...

[But he digresses.]

Yeah, I'd really like that! It's been forever since we actually saw each other in person! So you're in Goldenrod, then?

[Video]

[theotherother]

[Kaine's just scrolling through the Gear and then...there's this entire thing. Wow.]

The hell is this? Some sort of Pokemon Psychic Hotline?

[Is this spam? Or a commercial? Do these things even get commercials? No wait, the bit at the end seems too specific to be an ad.]

I don't know if it's going to get worse or anything. It better not.

[Times like this he almost wishes he could still see the future. Except for all the parts where it did him absolutely no good and just made things more of a giant mess.]

And are you serious about all that...psychic crystal crap?

[Not the nicest way to refer to it, but he's not really sure what else to call it.]

[Video]

[crystalballer]

[Hagakure doesn't even know where to start here, hoo boy. Nonbelievers are so exhausting sometimes.]

Hey man, don't go comparing me to those hacks on the hotlines. This is the real deal! I really can help you with your Psychic type Pokemon.

And yeah, I'm totally serious. A couple months back, something really similar happened with crystals showing up and Psychic types freaking out. It was really bizarre, but the crystals eventually went away save for some fragments that got picked up by people. Now they're reacting to the mini earthquakes that've been going on.

[Video]

[no_ufo_ending]

I've got one of those little purple guys...

_{[Real specific, Henry.]}

He's been acting really off. More off than usual, I mean. Where's this office of yours?

[Video]

[crystalballer]

[Yeah that's...not really specific at all, considering how many purple Psychic types there are. But Hagakure's happy to help, regardless!]

Oh, so you want a personal appointment? Works for me! We can get to the bottom of your purple dude's issues.

You in Goldenrod? I can text you directions.

video;

[a_sin_for_him]

I had noticed my sky cat has been more...beleaguered and nervous than usual with the tremors...

video;

[crystalballer]

[First it was "purple guy", and now it's "sky cat". Hagakure really would like some better descriptors than that.

He scratches at his dreads.]

Sky cat? Which one's that?

[video]

[fishybarrettes]

Oh! Is that what's going on? I thought it was just a bunch of earthquakes. I guess I didn't really notice anything that strange, I mean, the glowy eye thing was already pretty weird....

Wait, how can crystals cause an earthquake?!

[video]

[crystalballer]

Glowy eye thing...?

[He's not sure if he wants to know, but...may as well... After all, she might've run into a cryptid or something! Inquiring would definitely be worth it it then.]

But uh, I don't know for sure if they're the ones causing the earthquakes, but I had some shards of the crystals from back in May, and they react whenever an earthquake happens. Plus, the crystals actually came out of the ground when they first showed up. Pretty strange coincidence, if you ask me.

Action

[struck_out]

Hey Hagakure! Here, take this quick!

[Don't mind that hand that's come from behind him, holding what seems to be a basket of stuff.]

Action

[crystalballer]

Wh--huh?! K-Kuwata-chi?!

[That was actually a little unexpected. And he can see what Leon's doing here. He wants to have Hagakure add a few more items to make the total a different number.

...that's a pretty stealthy way of getting stuff for free, Leon. Thankfully Hagakure's too relieved to get away from the dreaded 444 to notice, so he gladly pays for what Leon has in the basket.

The new total is...P4445! Wow, that came extremely close to being yet another unlucky number. Close call or not, Hagakure can't help but let out a sigh of relief. Meanwhile, the clerk remains completely bewildered by what's just happened.]

Oh man, you totally saved me there, Kuwata-chi. I can't thank you enough!

[video]

[ajustcaws]

...woah, wait, what? That's what fortune telling with stuff that isn't flowers does...? Yeah, I might be able to use that... I think my Fearline is a little... iffy, but I don't know. I think falling from the sky kinda knocked him for a loop...

But man, I don't know what's up with those crystals! I'm wondering if everything will get super weird again and I'll have to spend like twentysome spears on another tower to break it. That got really old after a while!

[video]

[crystalballer]

Fortune telling can be done with tons of divining tools. It's not limited to just flowers! Though that's a pretty rare one, I gotta admit. Nice niche choice!

[He's impressed!]

So Fearline's...one of those purple cats, I'm guessing? I got mine from the sky too. If you're not sure the way he's acting is normal for his species, you can always have me try to talk with him through Grey, my Elgyem. I...don't know how well telepathy works through the 'Gear, though.

[Probably not well because of the distance, oops.

The next bit really catches his attention. He leans in close to the 'Gear.]

Oh, you took out a tower too?? I got one in Viridian!

[Video]

[babel_hacker]

Yeah, I'm starting to think it's like...a build-up to something major. If the crystals and earthquakes are related, along with our psychics acting weird, it's too much to dismiss as a coincidence.

[Will it be a legendary Pokemon waking up from the depth of the earth like an eldritch monster?!]

[Video]

[crystalballer]

Yeah. Plus, the last time Psychics were acting weird, the crystals showed up. They know something's coming...

[He shudders just imagining some huge and terrible showing up soon.

...hrmmm.]

To be totally honest, I've started having headaches again too, just like back in May. That's what's making me even more worried.

action;

[diehardreaper]

[ And there was this guy buying him and his duskull a drink at a nearby vending machine when the chaos erupts. Inbetween their getting a lemonade, Ronald decides to glance over at what all the commotion's about. ]

Blimey, you're an excitable sort, aren't you...?

[ A pause to fish out his wallet before plunking a single pokedollar into Hagakure's hand. ]

There you are. That'd make it 445p now, wouldn't it?

action;

[crystalballer]

Huh...?

[Hagakure freezes in the middle of his emotional outburst to look at the money in his hand, then to Ronald, then back.]

This is...

[Well, it's overpaying for his stuff, but at least he's not paying P444?

Extremely relieved by this development, he smiles gratefully at the stranger who randomly gave him money.]

H-hey, thanks a bunch, dude! You really saved me there.

[Video]

[crackpotcrocker]

Could be an ancient Pokemon awaking from it's slumber... or - [Denzel mumbles the next part rather nervously] You don't think that nightmare we all seemed to have had is coming back do you?

[Video]

[crystalballer]

...Oh crap, it's October, isn't it? I didn't even think about that...

[The week-long shared nightmare that put him and his friends through hell and back... He had tried to put that event behind him, to erase it from his memory.

He hadn't considered a possible connection between all this and the nightmare, because the first time it happened was in the middle of May. Huh...]

I really, really hope it's not that.

[video]

[twinsanity]

So you're in Goldenrod, then...

[Said with all the social grace that one would expect by now. Good to see you too, Alfred.

He's not exactly looking at the camera, he's studying something off to the side, but he seems to be thinking something over rather than flat-out being distressed, at least.]

Perhaps I wouldn't mind meeting with you in person. You were helpful last time, after all.

[video]

[crystalballer]

Oh hey, it's you!

[AKA that one guy from the network with a Gardevoir! Hagakure definitely remembers giving him some advice not too long ago. But if he's asking for a personal meeting, then that means...]

Is Lady doing okay? I'm always up for a meeting if she needs extra help.

[video]

[pinnedbangs]

[he honestly tuned out everything else Hagakure said]

You're a psychic?! Fo'real?!

[video]

[crystalballer]

[You know what, he'll take it because Rin sounds excited about the whole psychic thing.]

Well yeah, kind of! I don't read minds or anything like that, but I can foresee the future! It's my talent!

VIDEO

[codpieces]

[ gamzee's supposed to see the big picture here— he has a little mime jr that's been suffering at the hand of these headaches and migraines, and he hangs loosely on his trainer's shoulder, pointing out and trying to communicate possible!!! relief! except—

well. ]

So, you like . . . Tell fortunes, man? How the fuck do you get all— doin' that?

VIDEO

[crystalballer]

[Oh boy, that poor Mime Jr... Hagakure kinda sorta notices its plight, but its trainer's question is going to take priority because he clearly needs some help with the topic.]

Yeah, man! I tell 'em all sorts of ways. Palm readings, Tarot readings, astromancy, numerology, divine visions...I've mastered 'em all 'cause that's just what I do.

[cawsforalarm]

Dude, you're totally right! I had no idea what was going on!

[Even though Henry's Inkay is pretty new, he's known him long enough to know what's normal behavior and what's not. But what worries him the most is that even though Henry can actually talk to Pokemon, he's not gotten anything at all out of Glowgan.]

This is the first I've heard of glowing crystals, though. And what kinda fortune telling do you do? I learned how to do it, but I never liked it that much.

[crystalballer]

Ooh, you must've shown up after the crystals then. That was a couple months back. They were huge pink crystals that just popped out of the ground! They might've been what the Psychic types were freaking out about.

[As for the fortune-telling thing...oh boy, Henry's in for it now.]

I do all kinds of fortune-telling! And that's not an exaggeration, I actually know how to do any kind out there. [He crosses his arms, expression thoughtful.] What didn't you like about it? It's a really useful and fun skill!

[text] boop backtag hope you don't mind

[unkinder]

[Hey Hagakure GUESS WHAT It's this nerd again.]

...assuming you're not already overwhelmed with visitors, I might come. Mine aren't any better than they were.

[He wouldn't be coming in person if he weren't desperate, and having eight very small psychic cats in his room has become downright dangerous for his health.]

[text] not at all! c:

[crystalballer]

[Tensai yesss! Hagakure was hoping his fellow Psychic enthusiast would check in with him after this post. This time he's willing to go text to text too.]

You know I've got room for you, Tensai-chi. I told you to drop a line whenever you wanted to visit, remember?

How many are you bringing over?